It is estimated that more than 70,000 men are sexually abused or assaulted in the UK every year.
“Sexual violence can happen to anyone, no matter your age, sexual orientation, or gender identity. Men and boys who have been sexually assaulted or abused may have many of the same feelings and reactions as other survivors of sexual assault, but they may also face some additional challenges because of social attitudes and stereotypes about men and masculinity” – RAINN
You’re not alone, there is a variety of support available:
Independent Sexual Violence Advisor (ISVA or ChISVA for under 18s)
There is a vast range of support that an ISVA/CHISVA can offer, but their main role is to provide emotional support and guidance for anyone reporting current or historic sexual offences through the Criminal Justice System. We are independent from the police and other agencies.
There are many myths surrounding the sexual abuse of men and boys which can act as a barrier for people wanting to access support and can be incredibly harmful for survivors. We are working hard to raise awareness around the abuse of men and boys and to challenge these myths in everything that we do….
Myth 1: Men and boys can’t be sexually abused.
Fact: They can. Any man or boy can be sexually assaulted/abused. Researchers have found that at least 1 in 6 men have been sexually assaulted/abused in their lifetime. (https://1in6.org/statistic/)
Myth 2: Only gay men and boys are sexually abused.
Fact: Sexual abuse can happen to heterosexual, gay and bisexual men and boys and people who identify as non-binary or trans men. Being sexually abused has nothing to do with your current or future sexual or gender identity. (https://rsvporg.co.uk/)
Myth 3: Male abusers who sexually assault men and boys must be gay.
Fact: Sexual assault is not about lust, desire, sexual attraction or sexual orientation of the abuser. It is about violence, power and control over another person.
Myth 4: Men and boys cannot be sexually abused by women.
Fact: Although the majority of perpetrators are male, men and boys can also be sexually abused by females. Sexual abuse is any sexual behaviour or sexual act that happened without their informed consent.
Myth 5: Erection or ejaculation during sexual abuse means you “really wanted it” or “consented to it.”
Fact: Erection and ejaculation are physiological/bodily responses that may result from mere physical contact or even extreme stress. These responses do not imply that you “wanted “or enjoyed the assault and do not indicate anything about your sexual orientation.